Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Unicorn Sightings Rampant In NY!!!
Yes, that was in the news. However, if it was in New York its probably just some person living out some kind weird horse fetish. Because thats what goes down in NY, after sunset.... trust me, I have pictures. Anyways, its been a week since my last post so I decided to take this time to share more issues with you, or disturb you. I haven't really decided yet. The song is by Blink 182... Dammitt
The Adventures of Beyonce Knowles Weave!!!
Things that are disgusting, dating Jay Z, check. Having your daddy kick out the 4th member of Destiny's Child because you want more money. Saying the reason you didn't get nominated for an academy award in "Dream Girls" is because you didn't want to gain 20 lbs..... yeah okay. Playing a sassy soul singer in an Austin Powers flick, and never readjusting your voice to take the 70s sound back out. Oh and more disgusting wearing a weave that makes you look stitched up like Frankenstein. I guess she could have got a better weave if she gained 20 lbs.
Fergacrappascious...The Worst of 2006
I really don't know who told Fergie she could sing. I also don't know who told her she was hot, she kinda looks like an alien. But of course if your a 12 yr. old girl in braces, you probably think shes the greatest singer of all-time, and she will be touring for 20 years. You probably also think your closet is haunted, and leaving the light on will keep the ghosts out(or Dustin Diamond who played Screech on Saved by the Bell). First off, whats wrong with Fergie? Every single one of her songs she sings about how hot or fine she is. She really isn't she looks like an alien since she got all the plastic surgery before she joined the Black Eyed Peas. Remember her old group Wild Orchid? Look it up. The song Fergilicious is also a ripoff of the JJ FAD song "Supersonic", from 1989. Blah the arrangements, why does she have to make these laaa,,,, lallallaa ... la la la, with her mouth in every song? Its really dated, as she would say, "check it out". And that guy Will I. Am, I liked him better when his name was Wyclef Jean. Either way, these dudes will ruin alot of videos.
Boy Meets Wo.....nder Years...
Yes the Savage Brothers, Ben and Fred. Fred was the emmy award winning Kevin Arnold from "The Wonder Years". He stayed in the lime light for 5 seasons and 2 bad movies, appearing in the late 90s in the show "Work" and thats about all for him. Ben is his less talented brother whose hair resembles pubic hair starred in "Boy Meets World", a quirky little comedy that really ruined itself by following the characters grow up go to school, and get married formula.
Its light hearted approach was later ruined in its final 2 seasons covering more serious topics. But throughout the ages, it has often been debated as to who was the luckier brother. While Fred was more critical acclaimed playing a stuck up prick on The Wonder Years didn't exactly broaden his character. However, he did get to date Winnie Cooper(Danica Mckellar)who was the worst Tv girlfriend of all time. Her character came off as kinda cold and thoughtless, ditching her friends for popularity, cheating on Kevin in the final episode. Ben got to date a chick with the dumbest name of all time Topanga. Though some what attractive, she came off as goofy and kind of weird. Its rumored today shes working at a Bloomingsdale, while Winnie is actually a math professor, and has a math thereom named after her.
http://www.filelodge.com/files/room22/584245/danica-mckellar-0605-003.jpg
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Danielle(Topanga) actually dated Lance Bass and had no idea he was gay, talk about good actors. Kinda close to call on this one... not really
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Your Brother Likes Hotdogs?
Okay, yes its been about 4 months since my last post here, but yet I've had about 600 hits here the last 4 months so I guess, its time for an update. Lots of changes going on, this year... the year of the stingray,and fall of the K-Fed. Yo estoy los dios de sol. I hope you enjoy this hastly thrown together offering, and will probably be back sooner then 4 months. The theme, vanity.....
people who have never read this blog: paris hilton's nude roller blading donkey.
Koffi Annan, Star Jones, Lionel Richie, Andy Warhol. Anyone from My Chemical Romance who have a love for jelly donuts.
The song "Sour Times" by Portishead
The horror that is Lindsay Lohans Head
I will never understand what people find so attractive about this chick. Her head is shaped like an apple, I mean look at it, it makes you want to just go and bake some pies. Its just to round with high cheeks bones, yet you people all went out to see "Herbie" which by far is the Shakespearen piece of her work. And not to mention this is how she smiles in every single picture. But she can do whatever she wants with all those Herbie DVDs you have hidden in your dressers. I just hope she never gets a job at Glamour Shots in the mall. And now she's hanging out with Paris Hilton, who looks kinda like a Collie. They should be called Delmonte and Lassie. Okay that was best impersonation of any, comedian on Late Night At The Apollo.
The Delusional Years: The Girlfriends Fat Friend
Before it could get ugly I must state fat is an adjective, not a slur. Its a description of being how should you say more then overweight. And the description is only used in the context to help develop a psychological aura for the description of the character.
Once upon a time in the land of 10 yrs. ago, I was a college student working in a convience store. One of my co-workers was a rather obese chick, about 5-5, 280 lbs. But this didn't make her ugly, her disposition did. I ended up being the token guy at work she liked, which developed into her having a crush on me, being the only positive male in her life. However, she recruited one of her friends to try to get me to open up to find out if I had feelings for her, the large chick Mary. Her friend was very cute and in a couple of weeks, she developed a crush on me, and we started dating. The round chick Mary was okay with this. However, this is when
MARY GOT DELUSIONAL!!!!!!!
Slowly but surely to cover up her failed oppertunity at love with me Mary started telling stories. These were no ordinary stories, but stories of her past relationships. You see due to Mary's size and disposition, which was very cold and cruel she never had a boyfriend so she created boyfriends. Her friend told me in highschool Mary use to claim her boyfriend was over, so the friend would try to sneak over, and low and behold no one was ever there. Mary didn't even have any pictures of her boyfriend. When she felt uncomfortable about me and her best friends love life she told fascinating tales of her imaginary love life. Mary told us her first time, was with her boyfriend in the woods on the back of a 4 wheeler. We really tried not to laugh. There is no way physics and gravity could make that possibly for anyone let alone, someone her size. But this was her claim to fame. For fantasy it was really pumping on a dry well. That setting is the kind that would get Danielle Steel or any romance novel writer fired. But this is all she could come up with in her mind. So she gets the delusional award of 25lbs of sausage, and a gallon of macaroni. I never really saw Mary again, after 1997, she seemed to spend time trying to break me and her friend up(out of jealously and under the belief I started a rumor about her criminal record at our job after I quit), and ultimately would help her friend cheat on me, and 2 other boyfriends down the road. Which goes to oppose the t-shirt about fat people being able to lose weight, but ugly people will always be ugly. She was messed up either way.
