Thursday, May 25, 2006
Go Your Own Way....
Yes, I've been away, been busy. So here it is the special 2 week edition. To my latino fans Yo estoy el dios de sol!!!! Hope you enjoy this offering... The theme something sweet and something bitter... or Bite ear. Hahhahahahahaahahaha enjoy.
Chocolate Makes You Smarter, I thought it was those funny cigerettes?
Yep, they've done studies and chocolate does boost brain power.
"Chocolate contains many substances that act as stimulants, such as theobromine, phenethylamine, and caffeine," Dr. Bryan Raudenbush from Wheeling Jesuit University in West Virginia noted in comments to Reuters Health.
Which doesn't explain why the Willy Wonka character in the movies seemed like a sexual deviant. Or does it? This contradicts the theory by University Of Phoenix scientist that Chocolate makes your testicles fall off. I might be wrong on that source.
Mike Tyson is your Shakespeare....
Oh yes, glorious Mike Tyson, You and your words of wisdom. Though I could never beat you in your video game, Im sure you tremble that we never met. Because if we did I would have made you a cheese sandwich, you would have said it was "Estatic", in honor of your literary achievements,(not including the time you read The Cat In The Hat") here is a tribute to your classic quotes:
“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”
"My main objective is to be professional but to kill him."
"I want to rip out his heart and feed it to him [Lennox Lewis]. I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children."
I want to throw down your kid and stomp on his testicles, and then you will know what it is like to experience waking up everyday as me. And only then will you feel my pain.”
[To a female reporter] "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore... Unless you want to, you know."
I really dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage."
"I guess I'm gonna fade into Bolivian."
"I like the British bikes. I like British people. They're real mellow."
"I can sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating."
Oh mike you cad, you make wrestling promos seem intelligent.
The Fox And The Hound 2, "A Stupid New Beginning"
Once upon a time Disney did a cartoon based on a classic novel dealing with racism and segration, no its not "Rockadoodle" either. The flick "The Fox And The Hound" featured these moral overtones. However, now the Disney money machine is cashing in on it with a tastless sequel. In this adventure Copper and Todd's friendship is once again divided by.... get this..."Country Music", thats right Copper the hound joins a "Dog Country Music Band". Yeeahhhhaaaaa cha-ching!!!!!! This is a travesty, this would be like if they made a sequel to "The Passion", and had the dilemma being Its double coupon day at the Piggly Wiggly and Judas stole Jesus spam coupon. Thanks, Disney..... Watch for yourselves!!!!
Friday, May 12, 2006
Sick Of Myself
Blah, Well, welcome heres my blog I post about 2 times a week. Nothing extremely unusual or fascinating about it. But I AM the SUN GOD, to my friends in the latin world and here is an offering from me... even though I have no Idea what your saying.
Weird Random Video:Grim Reaper
I thought this was funny. Its from some practical joke show. The Grim Reaper always gets big laughs. Check It Out.
Your punishment is to share a prison cell with the hamburgler.
What is the deal with the Hamburgler? Why did Mc Donalds need this menance? Is stealing hamburgers such a big deal? I mean weirder things have happened liked hot 23 yr. old teachers dating their 13yr. old students. But what did the hamburgler go to jail for? I mean if im thinking advertising for a fast food restaurant, Im not thinking "yeah, we could have this guy dressed in prison garb who steals hamburgers. Yeah, thats a problem allright, its called schziophrenia. Or sometimes Its just called internet date night.
L'eggo my... never mind just take it.
God, Eggo Waffles. I will never understand the fascination with these things. Eggo waffles were invented in 1936, yes they will out live the roaches. Today they own a 65 percent share of the frozen waffle market. I think these things are just nasty, they taste like styrofoam. But thats not really fair to styrofoam, or Micheal Jackson. Anyways here are a few seldom known facts about Eggo:
1. Eggo waffles are made out of dead parrots.
2. If you stick an eggo inside your dvd player you will be able to watch the
first 3 season of Mr. Belvedere except the one were Wesley gets molested.
3. If you let an Eggo go if it comes back its your to keep, if not it was never
meant to be.
4. Once the Black Eyed Peas were suppose to have an Eggo Waffle as its opening act
but reconsidered because they didn't want to be upstaged.
5. Terri Hatcher once dated an Eggo waffle, then when it broke up with her she went
on Oprah and talked about her heartache.
yeah, these are stupid but I don't care.
Friday, May 05, 2006
Daddy Never Sleeps At Nite...
Hello everyone... er Buenos Dias to my Mayan friends who think of me as the sun god.
This is my blog, about a bunch of useless tasteless news that doesn't concern anyones world except the people whose world this is. Unless your the mole people. I try to update 2-3 times a week but didn't happen this past week. You see I started going to school online to finish up my education. That and you guys don't pay me to do this. But feel free to make donations to .... hahahahah right.
The theme,,, is poison, the band, your mind, and stuff to kill ants. Hope you enjoy this offering.
Every Rose has its GUN!!!!!!
Taken from Blabbermouth and Inside Edition:
POISON singer Bret Michaels told "Inside Edition" he's talking publicly about the two shooting incidents he's experienced recently because he's asking for help in stopping whoever has been shooting at him. "It's a pretty scary feeling to be randomly shot at no matter what it is," Michaels explained. "I'm not a real fearful person. I'm actually a pretty independent person and I'm not a big posse guy. I like to go live my life and do my thing but I'm taking this very seriously, I mean, everyone's taking it seriously. What you pray is that it's a random act of violence; you hope that it's just a couple of kids with a bb gun or a pellet gun."
Back in November in Massachusetts, someone fired a weapon at Michaels that shattered a window on his tour bus, and a similar thing happened two weeks ago, when a window in his car was shot out while he was driving in Los Angeles.
So basically someone is trying to kill or harm Brett Micheals, who sang "Every Rose has its Thorn" "Nothing But A Good Time" and "Unskinny Bop".
I'm betting it was someones boyfriend who Micheals was "Having Nothing But A Good Time" with the guys girlfriend. But maybe the answer is in the lyrics of his songs. In the song "Love On The Rocks" it quotes "love on the rocks, she's my shot.." their you go its a weird zodiac 80s singer killer. Next this guy will probably go for Quiet Riot because he could "C'mon Feel The Noize" in his head. HAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH ,,,, IM SO CLEVER.
Fear Factor.. another reason to hate Americans
Yes, I'm American and the sadness of reality tv shows really amaze me. And this turd of a show has been on for a few years now. Fear Factor is a show that puts people in phsyical, mind blowing, and sometimes life threatening challenges. Swimming with alligators, jumping through fire with cars, having a blonde chick in a southern town date a foriegn guy.... just crazy dangerous stuff. But then there is the stupid stuff. Like host Joe Rogan, Joe was originally on the classic show "News Radio" and did a horrible stint on "The Man Show", however Joe doesn't come across as a pathetic fantasy dwelling loser so the "The Man Show" was cancelled. Joe puts them through the weird challenges to decide if "fear is a factor", gag..... The weird stuff like eating a sausage made out of worms. To me this has nothing to do with fear. Its funny at night I never look in my closet to see if a sausage made out of worms is in there, trying to get me. Or the season finale a few years back was to drink a rat smoothie. Once again, when the phone rings late at night and someone breathes in it and just hangs up, I don't say, "Oh my god... I hope its not a rat smoothie stalking me." yeah. This has nothing to do with fear just stupidity.
Weird Random Video Clip: Giant Pet Ants....
As a child I often fantasized about what it would be like to have a giant pet ant. How it would be to lay in a field of dandelions while my giant pet ant would gentily rest his head on my lap while I read the poems of Emily Dickinson. Then me and my giant pet ant would build a fort in my backyard out of old boxes and blankets. Except Anty...(thats what I would call him or maybe even Sean) would then burrow a tunnel 20 ft. underground where he would then take a queen to protect and mate with. And that queen would probably be Jessica Simpson because she seems to get around alot lately. OH ANTY...errr Sean your too much. Watch this clip.
